Category Archives: Approaching Death Consciously

The Last of your Death Documents

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***Time for this post?  Reading…10 minutes. Listening…2 minutes. Implementing…one bit at a time.

I’ve recently written about Wills, Power of Attorney, and Personal Directives. All are essential because they cover differing aspects of managing our affairs before and after death.

These documents are not necessarily quick and easy to make. It would be understandable if you’re feeling that it’s an onerous task to put things in order for your eventual demise!

Sorry! There are three more documents to consider—your Last Wishes Letter, Paper Trail, and a Supported Decision-Making Authorization. These aren’t legally required, but will ease things for you and your family in a variety of ways.

This post gives you the essential information you need to make each of them happen. They don’t all need to be done at once, but after reading this you will have in the back of your mind what is required to get each of them completed when you are ready to do it.

Supported Decision-Making…

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Personal Directive. Why bother?

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*** Time for this post?  Reading… 12 minutes. Viewing…13 minutes well spent. Doing the work…take the time while you have it.

A Personal Directive (Advance Directive, Health Care Directive, Living Will) is an important piece of your paperwork. It’s the legal document in which you state your wishes for your personal care and medical treatment…or non-treatment. It only comes into effect if you are found to lack capacity to make personal decisions for yourself.

You need a Personal Directive as well as your Power of Attorney. Although both of them come into effect when you’ve lost your mental capacity to decide for yourself, the Power of Attorney can only address your financial matters. So a Personal Directive is necessary to give authority to someone you trust to make your personal decisions.

It’s about directing how you want your life to conclude…

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Death Documents — The Full Picture

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*** Time for this post?  Reading…5 minutes. Listening…4 minutes. Smiling…for as long as you can!

You’ve made your Will.

That’s a good thing.

Maybe you’ve asked the lawyer to prepare your Power of Attorney at the same time.

Even better.

But there’s more to consider…

Your Will and Power of Attorney direct what happens to your money and belongings.  But what about you, your person, your being? Continue reading →

Wills…without the mumbo jumbo

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*** Time for this post? Reading… 13 minutes. Longer than usual but it will save you time in the long run.

Although a hand-written will is legal in a few places, and you can always buy will forms and fill in the blanks, there’s plenty of room for error when you do it yourself—especially if your situation is in any way complicated. That’s why it’s recommended that you see a lawyer for both your Will and Power of Attorney.

The prospect of visiting a lawyer can be intimidating—sometimes because of fear of the cost (see here for clarification and reassurance), and usually because of a lack of familiarity with the terms and procedures. This post is meant to help you feel more comfortable about consulting a lawyer to draw up your documents. Continue reading →

Wills…getting down to business

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*** Time for this post?  Reading… 7 minutes. Implementing… however long it takes to make the call that gets the ball rolling.

Most of us cringe when we think about making our wills.

Such a pain!  Don’t even want to think about it.  I know that I should…and I will do it… one of these days.

“One of these days” doesn’t come for all of us.

Some die suddenly and the family is left scrambling to find out what is where.

Others find themselves very ill, debilitated, and in the hospital—with family members delicately trying to find out if there is a will without appearing to hope the person will die so they can get their inheritance.

Not a pretty sight, and not what any of us would want if we were thinking rationally.

Interesting thing about death, though…

The topic of dying tends to evoke irrational responses. Here are a few reasons for this. What would you add? Continue reading →

Putting Your House in Order

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***Time for this blog? Reading…7 minutes. Activating…up to you.

In my last blog, I talked about dealing with your things. Given today’s title, you may have anticipated ideas about sorting and distributing your possessions before you die. I will address that, but not yet. Today I want to discuss a less tangible, more abstract aspect of putting your house in order.

The paperwork…

No one’s favorite topic, I know. But if we don’t do it when we can—long before the end is in sight—we will leave a stressful mess behind.

Dealing with that mess will be much more challenging than clearing out your physical stuff. When it comes to belongings, your kids can bring in a junk removal service and have everything gone in a day so they can get your house on the market.

But…

If you don’t have your documents in place, they won’t be able to sell the house you own. That is a legal process and you must have given them the authority to act on your behalf. Without your authorization, they will have to jump through hoops to be allowed to handle your affairs. Settling your estate will cost extra time, trouble, and money.

Documents you need in place… 

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What to do with your things?!!

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*** Time for this post? Reading…3 minutes. Mind shifting…in an instant, if you decide it will.

We’re at the time of year when people are making New Year’s resolutions—or thinking they should be. I’ve never found New Year’s resolutions to be effective. Here’s why.

But the energy of the new year does seem to propel us toward change. It stirs up all the things on the mental to-do lists lurking in the back of our minds—the big and impossible-seeming jobs like losing 40 pounds, getting our personal papers in order, purging our house of all the excess.

Our brain spits out this list of onerous scenarios for what we “should do” and leaves us feeling discouraged or, worse yet, inept when we inevitably cannot muster the energy to make them happen.

Downsizing is not a constructive concept…

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Ages & Stages

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*** Time for this post? Reading…3 minutes.  Listening…5 minutes. Reflecting…as much as you want.

Being at the leading edge of the baby boom, I’ve arrived at the age where I’m considered old. I know this because cashiers now ask—without hesitation—if I qualify for the seniors’ discount!

So I’ve been thinking about aging, and paying attention to how it’s showing up in my daily life. I’ve noticed that I do less in a day. I’m not as strong as I was. But mostly, I care about different things than I used to.

Yet some things don’t change…

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Gifting from Your Treasures

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**Time for this post?  Reading…8 minutes. Unearthing your treasures…up to you.

In 1994, Stephen Covey co-authored First Things First: To Live, to Love, to Learn, to Leave a Legacy. There are many concepts in that book that informed my thinking, but it was the subtitle that really stuck with me. Here’s how he explained it:

There are certain things that are fundamental to human fulfillment. The essence of these needs is captured in the phrase “to live, to love, to learn, to leave a legacy.”

The need to live is our physical need for such things as food, clothing, shelter, economic well-being, health.

The need to love is our social need to relate to other people, to belong, to love and to be loved.

The need to learn is our mental need to develop and to grow.

And the need to leave a legacy is our spiritual need to have a sense of meaning, purpose, personal congruence, and contribution.

To leave a legacy…

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